Past Mistakes
by Light1
Summary: Alucard walks the Castle as Genya, forced to face the past and try to save the future. But can he get passed his own grief and do what must be done?


**Past Mistakes**

Disclaimer: Castlevania belongs to konami not me. I am making £0.00 out of this fic, it is written purely because I have a burning need to create. Although I would like to own Alucard . . . then he'd be mine.

Rating: PG-13- violence etc

Part: one of one

Authoress note: Alucard as Genya walks the castle

 **Past Mistakes**

It was all happening again.

After so long he had started to believe that it wouldn't happen this time that something, anything, would prevent the castle rising ever again. Hadn't they all suffered enough, hadn't they fought this stupid, pointless and hurtful fight long enough.

Alucard had walked the castle many times in his long life, although no human from his past would have recognised him now. His hair was black and straight, he had managed to control it enough to get rid of the natural wave and mortal dyes had changed the colour. His attire had also changed, long gone were the protective capes and elaborate dress suits, now it was all so much simpler. His suit was well cut and black, his shoes no longer knee high soft leather boots but rather firm soled gentlemen's business shoes. He had even changed his name, he was Genya now, although he doubted he would stay Genya very much longer.

Indeed if any of the castle inhabitants did not possess a sense of smell they would not have recognised him either. But his smell was the one thing he could not change, he could wear aftershave and various fragrances but it did nothing other than give him headaches.

The creatures of the castle would know him, they would know the scent of their master's issue.

Some of the creatures had responded to him in a confused fashion, unsure of his intentions. He soon made them clear and he was quickly received with hostility once again. It made things easier for him if he could keep the creatures baying for his blood, it made it easier to forget when they had been his friends and companions, a source of comfort. He had almost faltered when one of the demoness' of the castle had seen him and given a cry of delight, recognising him through his disguise.

She had run to him with cries of joy and words of disbelief. He recognised her and it wrenched at him, she had been motherly to him when his had died, she had given him sweets and soft touches and words of kindness. But she was still one of those who were causing great pain to the world below. He had made her death as quick as he could but he had still shed tears.

These hallways were cold.

They hadn't always been cold, at least not in the figurative sense, there had been a time when he had found the hallways warm and welcoming. He remembered hands tipped in venomous claws running gently through his hair, fur covered paws on his shoulders playfully pushing against him, trying to entice him into a game and finally the limbs less easily described, none had been harsh, all had been tender. He had been treated like a jewel, something to be treasured and protected.

But not when he had walked the halls with Trevor, then everything had been danger.

Trevor, he missed Trevor, the man had been so solid, so secure, a perfect creature to run to when Alucard's world was falling apart around him. Although that wording was wrong, Alucard's world had not been falling apart, Dracula had been tearing it apart. In his grief the ancient vampire had torn everything asunder. Trevor had been calm and focused where his father had been shaken and raging. So when Trevor had asked him to help he had agreed, it had almost killed him to do it, but his father was too out of control to reason with, this was the only way.

Richter had walked these hallways shortly after Trevor, maybe a generation or so after, Alucard couldn't be sure, he had never really kept track of the years or the generations. He had not walked with Richter when he had hunted the castle, much to his dismay he had only seen Richter walk the castle when the man was mad, claiming ownership of the diseased place.

Maria, however, he had seen her walk the castle.

She had amazed him, she looked small and frail but she most defiantly was not, she had walked the castle alone and she had done it with a strange cheerful demeanour. She had found his worry for her amusing as if he should have known better than to worry.

The humans in the castle now were not like those that he remembered.

They were weaker; they lacked the fire of their ancestors. But then Alucard felt he could not blame them, after all their ancestors had been raised to fight the castle and those walking the halls now thought of Dracula only as a fairy tale.

The boy, Soma, Alucard was sure thought the castle was some kind of game. Afraid of revealing his true nature he had left the boy to battle forwards alone, but he had kept tabs on him. He felt it every time Soma clashed against one of the castle inhabitants, felt it every time blood hit the castle floor and felt it every time one of his old companions died.

He also knew when Soma faced his last battle. He could feel the fighting, could feel the energy it caused and he almost fell to his knees. It was not the power that so pushed at him, but just the thought that this was all happening again. The pain he felt now when the two above him clashed was not so much physical as it was a tearing of his soul. It was just like before, just like when Trevor had fought Dracula and when he himself had faced his father alone. The battle above raged on and Alucard almost roared with frustration, why was it taking so long?

Why wasn't it over?

Why did he have to feel this AGAIN?

In his mind nothing could be worse.

However he was proven wrong. The worst part came when he felt the battle finish. He had told the boy that he was capable of this but he had known all along that he wasn't. There was something lacking in him, and that lacking had been his downfall.

The fight had finished and Alucard ventured up to the chamber above, cold seeping through him. Soma lay broken on the floor of the throne room, bleeding but still alive. There were cuts down his arms and legs, all of which appeared self inflicted, his nails were broken in the effort to claw out what was inside of him.

It was a pitiful sight.

There was something about seeing Soma lying broken on the floor that made his heart ache. But the man on the floor was not just Soma, the proof of that lay in the way the boys broken body was fighting to pull itself together, trying to be whole once more. It was agony to watch, even for one such as Alucard who had witnessed his father's travesties one after another. With a soft pained sigh Alucard walked to the boy who was slowly becoming his father and knelt at their side.

"I'm sorry," he breathed unsure of who he was addressing. He could still feel Soma but Dracula was the one who was looking out through the boy's eyes. "I'm sorry that all of this happened ... that it all happened again. That it got this far, that I let it get this far."

A bloody, broken hand twitched and it took Alucard a few moments to realise that Soma or his father was trying to touch him. Taking pity he moved his own hand into that of the boy, there was a small pained but pleased sound at the motion and it was then that Alucard knew that it was Dracula who had been trying to reach him and not Soma.

Alucard felt tears behind his eyes.

As a child whenever he had come close enough to his father Dracula had touched him, nothing possessive or even conscious, it was an unconscious gesture. A simple stroke through his hair or a hand on his shoulder, but it had always been there and if he touched back then his father would always be pleased. Touch is something that is so very often under estimated. The need to be touched is very primal. It is so fundamentally part of life that without it people die, it is possible to be touched starved, Alucard had witnessed creatures shrivel and die from lack of touch.

He could not remember the last time someone had touched him, simply because they wanted to, it made him realise that perhaps he was touch starved and that was why the gentle pressure around his hand felt so good, Alucard tightened his grip. It was out of pity, not out of sadness, or at least that was what he told himself when he lay down in the blood of a broken young man and curled around him, to help him die. Alucard didn't really know why he was putting what he knew had to be done off.

He did not want to kill Soma, but it was the same as not wanting to kill any mortal he came across, it was not personal. But this felt personal, and deep down he knew why, although he would never admit it out loud to anyone. He wanted his father back, the same way any child would yearn for a parent, it felt no different now that he was centuries old than it had when he was seven. He missed his father.

But he knew he would kill the boy next to him, he could not let the twisted creature that his father had become be free once again. He loved his father, but the father he loved was the one who would laugh at his son's games and purr quietly when his wife was close to him. It was not the raving monster he had already fought against twice.

He knew deep down that no matter how much he wanted his father back he would not be willing to pay the price that it would cost. Too many lives, too many people would have to die and it was not far to inflict such pain on them simply so he could have a father again.

Soma/Dracula shivered against him drawing his attention.

Alucard leaned up on an elbow and looked down at Soma/Dracula, noting that his body was now not quite as broken as it had been. However the light in the eyes was dimmer now, there was no red tint to them, instead they were completely human and Alucard knew that for this moment Soma was in control.

"He hurts, Genya," the words were strange and Alucard frowned before answering.

"You're badly injured, Soma, it will hurt I'm afraid," he sighed. "There is little I can do."

"No ... no ..." the boy was fighting for breath now but still managed to speak past his pain. "Not me," the words broke off and Soma's eyes closed. The trembling increased and the boy cried out, Alucard shook his head and placed a cool hand on the boys face.

Soma was fading, Dracula was rising and no matter what he wished Alucard knew that there was only one response. He removed a glove showing perfect pale skin and long elegant fingers; he had his father's hands, the black tipped claws on his finger tips proved it. He tensed those fingers and placed his claw tips gently on Soma/Dracula's chest. Eyes opened and looked at him and once again they were no longer human, but they were not deranged as Alucard had expected, they were calm and focused.

"You came back," the words were almost silent but Alucard heard them.

"Yes," he nodded, "I came back to you." The smile on Dracula's face could have been mistaken for Soma's own but Alucard could recognise his father easily. "I love you."

And with that he pushed his claws down into the still frail mortal chest and closed them around his heart, pulling it free of its moorings.

"Adrian."

 **End**

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